There is no real universal defining threshold you cross that means you've somehow graduated into long term relationship status, in fact some couples accomplish big life goals together in hardly any time at all whilst others can take a little longer. Me and my gent have been together nearly 4 years and in the grand scheme of things that's not a huge amount of time but for both of us this it's the longest we've spent with a partner. Here are a few things I've learnt from being with another person, was there a moment in your relationship when you thought yes they're a keeper or we've made it long term?
You Can Call Bullshit
A healthy relationship regardless of type can mean you can discuss almost every topic under the sun but you may not always agree, you're allowed to disagree and you can state your case - in fact having a difference of opinion can be an attractive quality. We're not all made the same and our interests can vary as can what we feel passionately about but when either party goes to a little too far you can call bull shit, for me having someone who speaks their mind and respects mine (or can challenge you and your intellect whatever level that may be) is an essential aspect in any relationship regardless of romantic feelings or not. He can calm me down if I get too angry or stuck in a negative way of thinking and I can call him out when he leaves an explosion of stuff in his wake so establishing a healthy balance of how you communicate together can help in the long run.
They've Seen All Of You
Now It's probable they've see you in a more intimate setting but I'm referring to when they witness you in all your true glory, the not so glamorous moments like when you're truly let loose on a plate of chicken wings, when you're slobbing your pjs, when you're without makeup but have greasy hair, when you have your big pants on or you've dribbled your dinner down yourself. When they still like you even after all of that, when they know your bad habits it must be more than a fleeting inclination. Sometimes some of the romantic days can be those when you're snuggled together on the sofa not dolled up - those little moments can make you appreciate them more.
When You Don't Always Share Food
When you first date someone it can be exciting but nervous all at once, you want to show the best version of yourself which includes not permanently wearing your at-home uniform and having to pretend you can eat enough for 5 people without help and although you don't want to act like another person entirely or lie you want them to see the more acceptable bits of yourself. When you get further into the relationship you're less likely to keep up the pretense and let reality sink in which means your version of lady and the tramp is less likely to happen but you're impression of a hoover with your dinner will.
There's No Filter When You Talk
As discussed in an above point you can bring up any and all subjects to the forefront, which could mean anything from 'what are we having for dinner tonight?', 'who are you going to vote for & why?' or even 'can you please buy me some period supplies as I accidentally ran out?'. Knowing that you can have a chinwag whether it be banal, political, personal, intimate or for the future can be a reassuring thought that may truely like you.
More Signs You've Made Into The Level Of Long Term:
- You can talk about your future together, possibly buying a house? Buying pets? Having children?
- They buy you little trinkets because they want to, because they know you'll like it or simply because they want to make your day a little brighter
- You haven't got your 'sexy' underwear out in a long time
- They finally make the bed after years of nagging
- There's a tv program you watch together, just together
- When you can wear trainers on a date
- They've seen you cry, not small tears but big ugly scalding ones where you can't talk - just blub
- When you have to do a double take because they didn't use your pet name
- You hear 'so when are you 2 getting married then?'
How do you know you've crossed that long-term line?